I don't need to be #1....right?

I'm not going to give any lame excuses for letting my blog slip, like I've been too busy or any other nonsense...because let's face it, if I have time to watch American Idol or The Bachelor, I have time. What I also have is a paralysis and habit to do nothing when I don't think I have the perfect means to the end.

I find that I have a debilitating condition that has plagued much of my adult life. My lack of achievement may seem like laziness (I refuse to think anyone would even consider inability as the perpetrator), but I believe it is my fear of anything less than perfection. Perfection may even be a little high, a fear of failure is probably more like it. I think I take "A job worth doing is worth doing well" to an extreme. If I don't have a perfect plan or know exactly the "right" way to do something, I end up doing nothing at all. I am trying to remind myself that success isn't being #1, in this world there is room for a whole lot of successful #2s and #3s and so forth. For example, there isn't only one successful coffee company. OK Starbucks might be the tops, but there are a slew of other companies turning profits (maybe not in the current economy) and who have fans and followers. The point is that there is room enough in the world for diversity, and unlike Olympic sports, being #2 and #3, even #20 can still be life-changing, wildly successful, and completely fulfilling.

So, in a very public way, I will be attempting to overcome this curse by posting something, anything, even just a thought, a little tidbit....and it doesn't have to be perfect, life-altering, or revolutionary. It will be my "therapy"...probably just what everyone wants to be involved in...and by everyone, I am talking about the 2 or 3 people who say they read this. My hope is that I will be motivated to take more chances in life and be less afraid of failure.

Well, I've used up all my time today and this is about as enlightening as it's going to get (I hear American Idol calling...talk about people with no fear of failure). Stay tuned for the fun to start!

Post-Holiday Relief

Well, it's been quite a while since my last post...nearly 20 days. Shameful! So now it's time to blog about what I've been up to and give excuses for my delinquent posts.

Shortly after my last post, we got an offer on our house. We had it very quietly on the market in the hopes of selling it before it went down anymore in value. While we really liked the house, and I especially adored the family friendly floorplan, we knew we didn't want to be there for 15 years so we felt it was time to liquidate. We were fortunate enough to get an offer from buyers paying with cash, so that was an extra bonus of not needing to worry about precarious financing in this uncertain economy. The big catch was that they wanted to be in the house before Christmas. So let me reieterate the timeline we were faced with....they signed a contract on Tuesday, 12/9, the house closed on Friday 12/12, and we moved out on 12/19!!!! 10 days total to agree to sell the house and move out...at holiday time!!! We were so lucky to find a beautiful rental home very close by in a great neighborhood of similar square footage and quality that was ready immediately. It was really crazy to pack and move and then host the holidays, but we are down to only about 2 boxes left to unpack and a few pictures to hang, so I think we've done pretty good, as tough as it was.

So, friends, please stop by and see our new crib or shoot me an email to get our new address.

Well, very shortly after settling into our new, albeit temporary, home it was time to celebrate the holidays and we were so happy to have my mom and step-father join us from their winter retreat in Arizona. The kids especially love to spend time with Grandma and Grandpa.

Bridget and I made Christmas cookies for Santa, starting the new family of leaving out cookies and milk. I asked Bridget if we should put out chocolate milk or hot cocoa, but she said we couldn't because it would get in his beard...so regular milk it was. Santa left a note in return thanking the girls for the goodies and asking them to continue to be good girls next year. Bridget was so excited to know that Santa came, she excitedly showed the empty plate to all of us.

Christmas morning started with the kids being very excited about their gifts from Santa, including guitars and computers (Leapfrog and V-tech) for the kids and stockings full of toothbrushes, notepads, hairclips and other practical goodies. Unlike some other 3-year-olds I've heard of who really only needed one gift, Bridget was quite content to continue opening gift after gift after gift after gift.... But I do think her favorite gift was the $5 DVD Stuart Little...we've watched it at least 10 times already (oh....have I depicted myself as someone who lets their children watch endless TV?). Courtney really liked her learning purse from Santa, which was surprising since I think it was a last minute choice of his. She actually only cared for Bridget's new Pez dispenser on Christmas morning, until she retreated to her Radio Flyer horsey (Bridet's gift from Santa her 2nd Christmas) for the rest of the morning.

The afternoon was full of feast preparations (thanks Mom!) and a visit from my step-brother and his family. Christmas with three 3-year-olds and a 1-year-old was fun if not a little ...um.... crazy. It was great to see the girls growing and all of their new developments...one of which was the way the grabbed step stools to help themselves to the abundance of cookies, crackers, brownies, and whatever else we had on the counters. I think we all had a great time and it was a wonderful holiday.

In the two days since Christmas, I have overwhelmingly enjoyed the quiet and have even been able to watch the first half of the Jane Eyre mini-series and even Prince Caspian (The Chronicles of Narnia). I just got internet access on my laptop yesterday, so now I can even catch up on emails...and yes, this blog. So, stay posted, I will write more, that will be among many resolutions I plan to attempt to keep in the new year.

Bead in the Nose Incident (aka What Every Parent should Know)

Well, it has been a couple weeks since the incident occurred, but I've been meaning to chronicle the ordeal and publish the solution in an effort to save parents of pre-schoolers and toddlers unneeded stress, anxiety, money, time, and ultimately a trip to the Emergency Room.

So I was at work and checked my voicemail only to discover a message from the daycare director that Bridget had lodged a rock up her nose. Knowing my daughter the way I do, I couldn't help but laugh and roll my eyes. I probably shouldn't have still ben chuckling when I called the director back though, having now painted myself as an unsympathetic mom. Well, I walked over to the daycare to see what I could do, and sure enough she had a very small pebble stuck about halfway up her right nostril. She would start squirming and screaming anytime we tried to get close to her nose. We got some tweezers, but just the sight of them completely freaked her out. I tried to get her to blow her nose, but she was too scared and refused.

Having exhausted every option we could think of, Bridget and I walked back to the hospital and into the Emergency Room. Luckily it was a pretty slow day in the ER and they got us in to see the doctor in less than an hour. So we got the obstruction out....but I was the one that did it.

Here's what I did.....

*** Instructions***
The doctor instructed me to lay Bridget on the bed on her back. I plugged the clear nostril with my hand and then blew into her mouth (like CPR). Just one puff and the pink bead popped right out (along with a fair amount of snot that coated my face...gross).

Yes, it was not a rock or pebble at all, but a pink bead that she had found outside. She liked it so much, she didn't want anyone else to get it....so she put it where no one could get it. Good thinking, Bridget! After the ordeal, Bridget and I went to the cafeteria to lunch on chicken nuggets and chocolate milk, then we walked back to the daycare in time for naps.

New Direction

My goodness, I can't believe it's been so long since I've posted anything. I am shamed by my friend Alison's blog...first for the glorious food, second for the fact that she posts entries daily. I need to get with the program! Well, I think I'll be better now that I have resigned from my job.

Yes, you heard me right. After 10 years....that's since I was 22 (in case you needed help with the math...oops, I've divulged my age)....I have decided to move on. It's definitely bittersweet. My decision is mainly based on the fact that there is no opportunity for internal advancement. The final straw was that my current title and pay are incorrect, a fact with which all of my management has agreed for 3+ years...yet they refuse to correct the injustice.

But I did say this decision was bitterSWEET. There is much to be happy and positive about. There is better opportunity for growth and potential outside of the hospital. And I have decided to pursue avenues in real estate...namely appraising. Yes, I'm aware the economy is, um, well, shaky to put it nicely, and yes, real estate has been the first victim of this catastrophic collapse. However, I've weighed the risks and benefits and feel confident that this will be the beginning of a fabulous chapter in my life, hopefully taking me to great places.

I hope you'll be happy for me. I am!

Happy Halloween

I hope everyone enjoyed a safe and happy Halloween. It is so fun to experience this holiday with children. Our girls have definitely changed our perception and priorities on this holiday (well, everyday really). We started our day with a Trick or Treat Parade through the financial offices at the hospital. Courtney's costume was a hit and she even loved wearing it. I couldn't believe how full Bridget's treat bag was after just going through those offices. She nearly had to drag it back to the daycare.

Later in the evening we handed out candy and then took the kids through the neighborhood. Our block is pretty quiet, but everyone was so nice and it was really nice to meet some people wehadn't before. Even though we took the girls in the red wagon, I still had to carry Courtney quite a bit and after just one block, we were done.

All in all, I gained 10 pounds, but a good time was had by all!

Get out the Vote - whatever your views :)

The upcoming election is full of issues that will shape our future. It's a crucial time in our country filled with war, economic woes, global warming, and energy dependencies. One thing is for sure, whoever moves into the White House will be better than George W. Bush (and yes, I think even Sarah Palin is better than Bush). As with any election, there is no perfect candidate, but Obama currently has a significant lead and stands for the change this nation needs. There are serious problems with the economy....mass foreclosures, increasing unemployment, and a volatile, sinking stock market that is affecting the entire world. I hope that Americans will vote for change, for unity, for prosperity, and for peace.

Another major issue facing California, and inevitably the rest of the nation is Proposition 8. This proposition would ammend the state constitution and ban same-sex marriages. This issue is frustrating to see play out since it so it is so emotional for the supporters of the proposition. It seems to me to based on hate and disgust for homosexuals. Underneath the lie that it will force children to be taught about gay marriage, is the truth that because supporters disagree with homosexuality, they don't want homosexuals to have equal rights....that would be like saying being gay is OK. The outcome of this race won't affect me too much...maybe not at all, but I don't like the true motives of the supporters and urge everyone to think about people's rights and not about whether or not being gay is "right". I have so many kind and intelligent friends and family members who support this proposition, but I think if they could really understand that it is about equality and how they have nothing to fear, they would not want to take a fundamental right away from anyone.

"Yes on 8" says, "the best situation for a child is to be raised by a married mother and father." And while that sounds like a sound principle, it isn't alway practical. In an ideal world, a lot of things that AREN'T, would BE. In an ideal world, no child would suffer from a disability. No child would suffer from disease. No child would be teased. No child would lose a loved one. Parents would not get divorced. There would be no learning disabilities. There would be no mental illness. In an ideal every child would be beautiful. No child would be overweight. No child would be poor. There would always be enough for everyone. Everyone would be accepted for who they are.

My point is that there are differences between us all. If we restricted rights and mandated specific lifestyles in order to create and ideal world, well, that sounds a little fascist, doesn't it? Is it right to stamp out diversity? Is it right to restrict love?

Children these days are lucky to have a "traditional" family...that's an increasing minority, for a number of reasons (homosexuality being the least of these). And having one mother and one father isn't always the best. There are a whole mess of "traditional" families screwing up kids. Which brings me to the point that it's not the sexual orientation or number of men versus the number of women in a family that determine the happiness and wellness of a child....it is the values of love and kindness and acceptance that are imparted on the child.

And keeping homosexuals from marrying won't rid the world of homosexuals. It won't keep them from having loving relationships (as well as dysfunctional ones like the rest of us). It won't keep them from having families. It just keeps them from saying they are "married". What's the point in that? What is the real harm? What are people REALLY scared of?

VOTE NO ON 8!

Wow, we've had a busy couple of weeks, and that has kept me from tending to my blogging. Our latest adventure took us to the Camarillo area for my step-sister's wedding. We rented a house in Oxnard with my sister and her family. That entailed a few fun trips to the beach and lots of cousin-fun. The wedding was gorgeous, and although it rained that day, it cleared up for the ceremony allowing us a beautiful outdoor experience. Amy was an absolutely gorgeous bride and I think she had a wonderful day. Bridget and her cousins were adorable and well-behaved flower girls. Look for the slideshow!

On the way down I was able to stop and see my dearest friend, Alison, and her lovely family. It had been just over 3 years (since Bridget's baby shower) since I had seen them all. I was so glad to see their home and have some time to catch up with them.

Hopefully things will slow down and I'll get some downtime at home. The weather has started to turn cold and it's time to organize the girls' closets and get them ready for the cold. Bridget threw a fit this morning in her jeans because she couldn't "see her knees". What are you going to do.

I hope everyone is well.

XOXOXOX